September 11: Always Remember

New York City has worked hard to rebuild itself after such a tragedy took place.

Today instead of spreading blame and hatred, we should just honour those brave souls who risked their lives to save as many as they possibly could. For all the families, be strong and take comfort that those you have lost, will always remain in your hearts forever.

💜 Always remember. 💜

Please check out my fiance's blog who deconstructs one of many viral videos about how 9/11 was a "hoax."

http://scambusting101.blogspot.ca/2016/04/promoting-idea-that-people-who-lost.html

Happiness & Progress: Ed Arditti

Sharing a recent photo that my mom took of my dad. :) 

A very happy moment here.

Movie Review: 15 Reasons To Live

Have you ever made a list? Of course you have, whether it is a grocery list, general to-do list, or even the elusive bucket-list, these lists show a piece of our identity. In the film, 15 Reasons To Live, director Alan Zweig converses with many eclectic people who share their own reasons for existing. Positively stirred up by author, Ray Robertson’s collection of essays “Why Not? 15 Reasons to Live,” Alan takes a real look at the themes pertaining to love, intoxication, humour, solitude, work, duty, home and death.

15 Reasons To Live 

In a forth-right, yet conversational style, Alan goes beyond just the surface level of interviewing, allowing an honest platform for each person to share a personal story or memory as they vividly remember it.

Meet a young and inquisitive girl who is the constant literal punching bag at her Catholic school and is kicked out, due to not partaking in rituals and her questionable faith. Experience the life of an overwhelmed mother of five, who oddly finds sanctuary people-watching in a busy shopping mall.

Next, against all odds, after a serious stroke, an older man uses his determination to learn how to read again, even if it takes an entire day to read one single page of a book. A wealthy Chinese man is stuck in an unfulfilling career that keeps him in a depressive and suicidal state, until moving to Canada, where he is given a second lease on life and finds his true calling as a massage therapist.

There are also plenty of other stories to embrace, as the film carries on, in a slow but methodical pace.

I would definitely recommend viewing this film with your heart and mind fully open. Encounter some fascinating human miracles. The gambit of emotions that is felt throughout the film might seem like a pendulum, but I think that is truly what Alan was hoping for.

It’s all about taking a deeper look inside of our souls, asking questions that seem on some level beyond what we could fathom of explain to another person. It is also about the collective experience, sharing our memories, wisdom, and opportunities for growth and change, which keeps us in tune with the world that we live in and those that we hold a special place for to accompany us through life.

In the final moments of the film, it is evident that by listening to each story, and seeing each person through a different pair of eyes, our similarities outweigh our differences, and we are all connected.

Neuro-Minded: Insight into Neuro-Biofeedback

Have you ever felt like the weight of the world was on your shoulders? For many people, this statement can be taken to heart. Problems exist in everyday life and some may be as insignificant as a hang nail or be as catastrophic as a terrible life-changing accident. Most view stress as simply an inconvenience and have the ability to move on. They can go grocery shopping with ease, have regularly scheduled medical appointments, socialize with friends, and even travel.

However, there is a darker side to stress that cripples both the body and mind. It eats away at reality and harbours the most painful memories, to the point where functioning is grossly impaired. Sometimes you’re okay and no one would ever suspect you had an issue, and other times, for no apparent reason, you’re whipped into a mind-set of uncontrollable fear and panic that takes over. You try and stop it by using all the different techniques, but nothing helps and so when the episode finally ends, all you want to do is cry because of how physically and emotionally exhausted you feel inside.

Post-Traumatic-Stress Disorder is real and not an imaginary condition. It’s not an illness that only war veterans suffer from, it could plague your neighbour, parent, sibling, or even your partner. With the amazing advances in modern medicine, Neuro-Biofeedback is a technique used by many professionals to help people who suffer from a wide range of conditions and it is available here in in many places, including my home town of Windsor, Ontario. Many doctors are proponents of this form of therapy and have seen great results from their patients, along with psychological counselling, and without the long-term use of medication (which often can be more harmful because of the nasty side effects).

I am fortunate to bring my readers some insight into this procedure, by following a woman through Neuro-Biofeedback. To preserve her dignity, she has asked me not to disclose her name, due to the fact that she is worried that she’ll lose any chance of gaining future employment, and the stigma it will bring to her older children/family, since not everyone understands and may see her in a negative light.

However, she was touched that I reached out to her and I have committed myself to documenting her progress until her sessions are done. So, we came up with the name of “Lucy,” named after icon Lucille Ball, whom she admires greatly. She’s excited, yet a little nervous to be sharing, but feels happy for a chance to get her life back on track. I also note that you’ll be able to get an idea of what goes on, but the main purpose is the content you will read from her personal feelings after each session. If you are interested in the actual barebones, it makes sense to book a consultation with someone who specializes in this form of therapy.

So what’s next? Lucy washes her hair with baby shampoo to get ready for her first “brain-mapping” session.

Stay tuned.

Valentine's Day 2012!

Happy Valentine's Day!

As commercialized as Valentine's Day is, it's still my favourite holiday. It's kind of bitter-sweet in a way too because my mind still remembers some painful ones, but I do my best to focus on the positive memories. We had a lovely Valentine's Day celebration weekend together. Bill got me a box of Ferrero Rocher Collection chocolates that i've never tried before and 2 DVD's. Oh and who could forget, he watched Bridget Jones's Diary from start to finish with me! =)

I got Bill a book that he wanted and thanks to my friend Stephanie for whipping up a batch of  mouth-watering choco/peanut butter cookies (Bill's fav combination).  She's a baking goddess...truth be told. :)

Reign Over Me Movie Review: At Least You Two Have Each Other

Movie Review:

There is nothing worse in life than suddenly losing someone you love, and in the movie Reign Over Me, for Charlie (played by Adam Sandler) he is grief-stricken by the loss of his beloved wife and three children after the September 11th attacks. They are memories he would rather bury deep within than ever acknowledge again. 

Continuing to live in denial and isolation, Charlie meets his old College friend Alan played by Don Cheadle, who is dissatisfied with his career, his inability to connect with his wife/kids and life in general. Alan begins to find happiness again and a real purpose as his friendship with Charlie deepens but soon realizes he must do whatever it takes to not give up on someone who has already given up on himself. 

Whether you actually mourned the loss of someone close to you during September 11th, or just felt compassion towards those whose lives were forever changed that day, this is a movie you will never forget. 

I couldn’t have asked for a better pairing as the bond between Alan and Charlie never seemed forced. They were both genuinely committed to their roles. Adam Sandler is mostly well-known for comedic films, but he certainly proves that his talents are not limited to one genre. I also thought that although he only had a very brief part, Donald Sutherland as the judge gave a great performance. 

Overall, an inspiring movie that really shows how someone can come back into our lives after years of absence and still help to transform us even in times of crisis.

Fugitive Pieces Movie Review: You Can Choose To See What Destroys Something

Movie Review:

In the movie, Fugitive Pieces, the innocence of a child is broken when a young Jewish boy living in Poland named Jakob (young-Robbie Kay) witnesses his family killed by Nazis. In his efforts to escape, Jackob is rescued by an Archeologist named Athos (Rade Serbedzija) who raises him. As the years go by, Jakob (older-playing by Stephen Dillane) is still haunted by painful memories and is consumed with finding out what happened to his beloved sister, Bella. (played by Nina Dobrev-well known for her lead role in the hit teen drama: Vampire Diaries)

The entire movie is very well directed and every emotion is captured so exquisitely with brilliant performances all around. The poetic narration expressed at the beginning shows the desperation of putting the pieces together and the mental exhaustion that seems to ruin any potential for a real romantic attachment for Jakob. 

Although this movie does have brooding moments, the bond between Jakob and Athos is heartwarming and genuinely portrayed. There is an enormous amount of passion during certain scenes that just bring you to tears. 

As an unexpected visitor appears, Jakob's thoughts of despair are challenged as the feelings that he has been yearning for are no longer buried so deeply in his mind as healing seems possible again.

2-Year Anniversary

Lyrical Expressions

****

Looking from a window above

It’s like a story of love

Can you hear me?

Listen to some music, maybe just talking

Get to know you better

Wise men say, only fools rush in

I know that we can be so amazing

And being in your life is gonna change me

I’ll take my chances, I forgot how nice romance is

I think I know why the dog howls at the moon

So save the last dance for me

Say good-bye to not knowing how to cry

You taught me that

The telephone call that tied up the line for hours and hours

Wouldn’t you agree?

Baby you and me, got a groovy kind love

She will listen to me when I want to speak

About the world we live in and life in general

She could dance all night and shake the paint off the walls

You stand by me

I’m forever yours

Faithfully

Darling come here

Slide on down beside me baby

I wanna feel your ecstasy

Aiming fingers searching secret pleasures

Roaming where your river seems so deep

I never thought tonight could ever be this close to me

My life is simple like the wrinkles on my skin

Sometimes all I need is the air that I breathe yes to love you

Truths you find through your adversities will defend you

As your powers and all your energies conspire to carry you

I’m going to smile because I deserve to

It will all get better in time

I see my future in an instant

And there it goes

I think I've found my best friend

Words are all I have to take your heart away

He kissed me in a way that I've never been kissed before

He kissed me in a way that I wanna be kissed forever more

Now I think it's kinda funny that you say you love me

You tell me that I'm crazy then you smile

God only knows what I’d be without you 

****

I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words,

How wonderful life is, 

Now you’re in the world. 

Happy 2 year Anniversary, I love you!

~Melissa~ 

I was truly inspired by many artists/bands to create something personal that would remind us of all the memories we have shared together for the last 2 years and counting. 

*Credit for all the lyrics goes to: 

Yazoo, Abba, UB40, Michael Buble, Billy Joel, Johnny Clegg, The Drifters, Madonna, Erasure, Phil Collins, Depeche Mode, The Hooters, Journey, Lords of Acid, Wolfsheim, The Cure, Jann Arden, The Hollies, VNV Nation, Leona Lewis, Savage Garden, The BeeGees, The Crystals, Chantel Kreviazuk, The Beach Boys and Elton John.

The Beginning of Healing

ying yang - the balance of life

Well this is my first official blog and you may be wondering why on earth I would start it on January 6, 2009 instead of the beginning of the New Year. I guess today’s events which I will fill you in about soon enough, provoked that urge to start one.

So my question to everyone reading this: is love like a piece of Doublemint gum? In front of me, I have a piece of spearmint gum. It’s wrapped up perfectly in its packaging, without a single fray to the edge, tear or crease along the paper. When I pick it up, I gently bring my nose close and sniff. The mint aroma is quite potent and even a little overpowering at first, but the idea of chewing a fresh, new piece of gum is quite exhilarating. The touch of the foil between my fingers feels like a sensation I’ve never even experienced before. I open it up enthusiastically, popping that single piece into my mouth, hoping that it will last forever.

As I’m chewing, I’ll tell you that my day started out just fine and you know that feeling when you are in a good mood, suddenly you get this unexpected surprise that just completely knocks the wind out of you? Well, that's probably an understatement of how I felt until I opened up the newspaper to be greeted by a face I never thought I would have to see again.

Maybe I could say that I felt like a child realizing that Santa Claus actually didn’t exist and their mother or father was actually the one eating those cookies and warm milk. Damn all those carefully constructed letters to the North Pole! 

I don’t know how to explain it properly or exactly how I felt, but at that moment, all the hurt just came flooding back to me. I know that my healing process has been considerable and if only the spirits were kind enough to give me a fair warning so I could have prepared! I guess the joke was on me. Haha…

My original piece of gum that was really soft and making my mouth happy is now getting a bit more difficult to chew and I’m needing to use way more effort now to get the same feeling I had before. It can’t go away this quickly.

So I think I was mentioning that I was dreaming and what I saw was clearly a figment of my imagination, right? I only wish. It was smack dab right in front of me and I just tore up the paper into a million pieces in a sudden fit of rage and threw it in the garbage.

The effort I was using for this gum is not helping much but I continue to chew, hoping it will get better with time. The minty flavour will return, it has to, I’ll just try harder.

After that brief shock, I was able to actually take some time away and have a plentiful lunch. Carbs are a girl’s best friend, screw the diamonds. I’m an emotional eater but I still couldn’t shake the feeling that he was still around.

Then the paranoia set in of will I actually see them in person now? Maybe I shouldn’t ever leave the house again to avoid feeling the pain. I could just have meals delivered to me, shop online for necessities and do distance education classes. Then I had a second to realize how absurd I’m being.

Unrequited love is painful but this went way beyond anything in my wildest dreams, or rather nightmares.

My gum is now stale and I’m ready to toss it away. It kills me to even remember those good moments of chewing, so I rather forget it all. I just want to get rid of this gum for good. I’m happy that I have switched brands, and have the potential of finding a new flavour even. Opening up a new piece will most likely bring back all those pleasant feelings, but let’s hope all the pieces from now on will last much longer.

So obviously I shouldn’t care anymore, but there will probably be parts that will resurface. The pain  will perhaps go away one day. I’ll be able to look back and laugh at all this.

I keep that faith, after all, it's my middle name. One thing I will say though is that with the supposedly comforting phrase of "time heals all wounds" I’d like it to happen already.